A little something to Ponder on those cold winter nights
I can honestly say that the last hour of work was one of the most enjoyable of my life. My equally sick in the head sista and I have compiled a list of questions for you to ponder, answer, or simply marvel at how two such sick and highly paid government workers can spend their time on a quiet afternoon...please keep in mind that we BOTH answered each of these questions.
If we ever get fired for doing this, will each of you put in a dollar to help pay our bills???
1) If you had to pick 5 celebrities (can be any type of celebrity) that you want to have sexual relations with..who would they be and in what order?
2) Who would you rather have Sex with?
Jack Black or Kevin Smith
Prince or Billy Bob Thorton
Chris Kattan or Jason Alexander
Kid Rock or Tommy Lee
Kramer or that big tall guy from Everyone loves Raymond
3) Would you rather?
-- get dunked in a septic tank or eat a chocolate bar dipped in poo?
-- have sex with Tim Spicer (for those of you that don't know him..he is J-Dubs cousin that looks like Mr Burns) or have a lesbian scene in a porno movie
--squat on the front counter of the SCC and when soembody comes in…fart in their face..or get strapped to the front of my car naked and drive around town
4) Would you rather?
--have a guy shoot in your mouth or eat out a girl
--Fly in an airplane 12 hrs with a 2 year old kid or spend 1 weeks alone in a cabin in the woods
--Eat a cockroach OR eat poo
5) Would you rather ?
-- walk around with white pants and a ragg stain or walk around with your nipples hangin out the top of your shirt
-- show a new boyfriend a giant poop you had in the toilet or pussy fart in his face while eating you out?
--get doug to wipe your bum for you after a diarrhea or have sex with paul innes?
6) Where would you rather live ?
-- In an Igloo in Siberia or In a Hut in the middle of war torn Africa
--An indian Reserve in Sydney or Digby Neck
--A Ghetto in NYC or Somewhere in the Middle East
--With a Community of those religions freaks that wear the head things and long dresses (can't remember their names) OR a bunch of Jackie Tars in NFLD
7) Would you Rather?
-- take a dump in your garbage can in your cubicle…a farty diarrhea dump…or change your tampon whle standing on your desk
--ask the lady at the sushi area of the SS if they could carve you a cucumber into a suitable dildo or prentend to have a voilenet orgasm the next time you get a pap test
--tell people at work that you have herpes of the genitalia or work out at the gym wearing one of those thong suits..
8) Where would you rather have sex?
--In the bathroom at work or in the bathroom at a sporting event
--In a porta potty or in a stinkly slaughter house
--In your parents Closet while they are in bed in front of one of your friends
9) Would you Rather?
-- wear an adult diaper and shit your pants (audibly…) in a restaurant on a date OR ask your dad to shave your bush and be deadly serious about it.
--.eat your own puke or smear somebody elses on your body like you are lathering yourself up for a porn movie
-- watch really really really raunchy porno with your parents…or walk in on them riding doggy style and watch for 2 minutes
10) Who would you rather have give you a pap test?
--Your dad or that creepy guy who collects cans around town
--Your little brother or Bax Noel
-- a stranger or an X BF that you hate
Cheers to the sickos!!!!
J and T